Inerrant Rampancy

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Sarah Palin Can Go Fuck Herself.

…no, seriously.

Perhaps you  heard about this and perhaps you didn’t (honestly, I don’t watch late-night shows anymore so I only  caught it through the Drudge Report), but a little while ago David Letterman made a joke that pissed off Sarah Palin. During the monologue, Letterman quipped about Palin visiting NYC and taking in a Yankees game, saying that during the 7th inning stretch Sarah Palin’s daughter was knocked up by Alex Rodriguez. Palin threw a fit, even going so far as to claim that the joke was spiteful toward all women, and not just her idiot children.

Now, after about a week, Letterman has caved, and issued an apology of sorts, claiming he didn’t know which daughter was there. The whole apology sounds a bit sarcastic, and Dave goes out of his way to point out that it was the misinterpretation of the joke that was the problem, but I don’t think the apology was even necessary.

Sarah Palin is an idiot. Yes, she runs a city in Alaska, but it’s a city that’s smaller than most companies, and there are plenty of idiot CEOs still drawing a paycheck (AIG, GM, Bank of America, the United States Government) so it can’t be that difficult. Fact is, the election campaign exposed her as the underachieving, small-town bumpkin that she is, and it was no surprise when her daughter Bristol became pregnant (some might call it ironic or poetic). As Bill O’Reilly has said many times in the past (though he conveniently forgot about it when Bristol came along), when a child becomes pregnant, it’s the parents’ fault.

So guess what? It doesn’t matter which daughter Letterman was talking about. Both of them are products of the same terrible upbringing, small-mindedness, and ridiculous views on sex, so both are fair game when it comes to jokes about getting pregnant. And I’m pretty sure most people understand that. I think the people who are making a stink (conservatives and Palin supporters) want to believe that the implication was rape, and so to make it worse they focus on the younger daughter (because raping an adult is terrible, but raping a child is somehow a million times worse because…well, I’ve never been given a good reason why that is) and turn this into an issue of misogyny and pedophilia.

Those people, like Sarah Palin, are morons who only want to destroy those who are critical of them, even though the criticism is earned. I say this because I understand the actual implication of the joke. Letterman wasn’t joking that Palin’s daughter (it doesn’t matter which one) got raped; he was joking that Palin’s daughter willingly had sex and then got pregnant because she didn’t use birth control.

Fact is, Sarah Palin’s ideas about sex and prophylactics are so re-fucking-tarded (sorry Trig) that it would not surprise me (and nor should it surprise anyone else) if each of her daughters were pregnant from now until eternity. I feel particularly bad for Todd Palin, because the only reason Sarah hasn’t been churning out more children recently must be that she and Todd aren’t engaging in anything other than 2012 campaign meetings (that’s right Todd, your daughters are getting more action than you are; maybe your wife should stop staring at Russia and come to bed).

So to all of you who think that the Palin’s are unfairly targeted, and that Letterman is a pedophile and a woman-hater, and that the liberal media is only out to destroy our values and sink our country into the ocean–please, do what Sarah’s probably doing (and what Bristol should have done) and go fuck yourself.


June 16, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized

1 Comment »

  1. haha sorry trig. this is great. let’s send her condoms in the mail.

    Comment by sacha | June 16, 2009 | Reply

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