Inerrant Rampancy

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We Are in a Crisis!

…JK LOLZ!

Remember when President Obama told us that this was a serious economic crisis and that if we didn’t act quickly and decisively (i.e., without anyone outside of the three branches of government’s consent) things would go from worse to worst? Me too. Those times sucked, right? In fact, things were so bad we went along with President Obama’s plan to spend a trillion+ dollars we don’t actually have right now to fix them. We said, “Hey, I don’t care about the details or the crazy ramblings of Nobel prize winning economists about how this is a bad idea. I just know that if you don’t spend all that money that I’m going to have to pay back with interest in the form of higher future taxes/loans from foreign countries who may not like us, the stuff is really going to hit the fan. Gay people might get married or something.”

And so the money was spent. More than a trillion dollars was given to failing business, many of whom failed either because they were run by crooks and idiots, or because they were forced by the government to run their operations poorly in the interest of the “public good”. A bailout, if you will, but not to worry: it was all worth it. Remember, there was a crisis and something needed to be done because things were really really bad and on their way to worse.

GOTCHA!

Hahahahahaha! Oh man, you should have seen your face. You were totally punk’d.

See, according to Breitbart.com the President said today that things are “not as bad as we think.” That’s right, folks, all that talk of impending doom and economic Armageddon was just ehhhhver so slightly off base, and things aren’t quite as dire as the President told you they were, you know, right before he asked you to let him spend all that money.

Obama went on to say, in what has to be the most ironic statement of the year,  “I don’t think things are ever as good as they say, or ever as bad as they say.”

Really, Mr. President? You mean when someone repeatedly tells you that things are the worse they’ve been in over 70 years and will continue to deteriorate if you don’t let him throw money at the problem while simultaneously forcing a political agenda into effect under the guise of necessary aid, he might be wrong ? Wow.

And gee, I wonder if they would ever say things like that on purpose, so that they could better justify actions they know to be incompatible with common sense. No, that would be like saying a bill needed to be voted on so incredibly quickly that you couldn’t afford to let it be publicly reviewed for 48 hours first, like you said all new bills would be, and then waiting 4 days to sign it after it was voted for.

Our new president would never do that.

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March 13, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized

1 Comment »

  1. or because they were forced by the government to run their operations poorly in the interest of the “public good”. This is the key sentence!!! We must always raise the red flag when those words are spoken by elected officials regarding business matters and the economy. Well done Mr. Joe

    Comment by Joel | April 22, 2009 | Reply


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